Friday, February 18, 2022

Courage, Dear Heart

It’s time for battle, friends. Tomorrow we meet with my new oncologist and I get started with treatment. Lots of decisions ahead. Lots of unknown. Lots of fear. Lots of faith. I am changing my profile picture tonight to remind me of a time when I stepped into something which required a bit of courage. 

In 2015, while in Africa, I had the most amazing experience getting to "walk with lions." In retrospect, it might not have been the wisest decision of my life, but it certainly was one of the most thrilling. It’s hard to explain exactly how that happened. My equally adventure-seeking friend, April, and I just kind of went with it. You know, like we weren’t middle-aged moms with husbands and a bunch of kids and carpool duties, but like we were young college kids thinking “Well, while in Africa!” We both are a little wired that way. I guess we were missing that third, more discerning, friend who might have stopped to ask a few more prudent questions.

We weren’t thinking about the fact that we had responsibilities—not to mention families—back home. We weren’t thinking about the fact that this wasn’t some well-vetted adventure ride at Disney World. I guess it’s safe to say, we weren’t thinking at all.

Victoria Falls  
another wondrous moment
from that same trip
We almost backed out. We got to the game preserve and realized our guides would only be carrying sticks on our little walk. They provided us with sticks as well. Well, okay then. No one seemed super concerned about anything and nothing seemed all that buttoned up about the whole affair. But there we were: Lions and sticks and the two of us in the middle of Africa. And, that day,  we walked with the lions. And it truly was one of the most wondrous moments of my life. 

Yes, I guess that experience took equal parts courage and stupidity. I still question my judgment, but I will always be grateful for what it gave me -- an incredible moment and a new wonder and respect for these mighty beasts. And, of course, that great photo! 

I've always had a thing for lions. Ever since reading The Chronicles of Narnia as a young girl, I’ve deeply loved the lion character, Aslan. He always showed up just in time. He brought encouragement. He brought calm. He brought wisdom. He brought victory. If you’ve spent any time reading C.S. Lewis, you probably also know Aslan represents Jesus. The King, Mighty to save!

In the 5th chronicle, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, as they are headed toward total darkness and feeling utterly abandoned, Lucy, in great fear, cries out to Aslan for help. “Aslan, Aslan, if ever you loved us at all, send us help now.” It’s fantasy literature and so of course there’s a beam of light and a lot of other dramatic stuff, but in that awful darkness Lucy heard the voice of Aslan whisper calmly to her, “Courage, dear heart.” 

It’s quite a scene. And I’ve always loved those words-- “Courage, dear heart.” These days, I'm feeling like I somehow landed in quite a scene. It’s definitely the darkest valley in which I’ve ever walked. And, like Lucy, I have many times in these past weeks cried out to God in my wild storm, “If you love me, Lord, save me. Save me!”

I know He hears every cry of my heart. And though I have no idea how the next chapters of my own story will go, I know, like Lucy, I have clearly heard Him whisper through the darkness and in my personal battle, “Courage, dear heart.” 

And that quiet voice is everything in this kind of darkness. 

One last thought---that stick! Oh, that stupid, simple, useless stick in my hand in the presence of this mighty beast. Look at how ridiculous I look perched there with my smile and my stick. Okay, truth is, I couldn't help the smile on my face, but that stick reminds me so much of what we bring to the table in our own battles. We have not victory because of our own sticks. We have victory because we stick with Him. Our courage isn't found in any implement--no matter how sophisticated or crude--our courage is in the calm, mighty One on whom we must lean. Our Mighty Lion.


“I believe that I shall look upon 

the goodness of the Lord

 in the land of the living!

Wait for the Lord; 

Be strong, and

 LET YOUR HEART TAKE COURAGE;

Wait for the Lord.”  

Psalm 27:13-14

Thank you for standing with us in the gap, for battling with us in the storm, and helping point us to Jesus each day.  

We are grateful for each and every prayer.  Love, Jody



don't judge. =) 



2 comments:

Bobby Darnell said...

Jody,

This absolutely one of the best posts I have ever read. Thanks so much for sharing such an important message and reminder that we, as believers, can find encouragement, calm and wisdom from what others may find scary.

As I read your post, with all the wonderful pictures, in the background of my mind, I heard Bruce Cockburn's song 'Wondering Where The Lions Are' where he too highlights we can 'fear not' and this line specifically came to mind:

"I had another dream about lions at the door
They weren't half as frightening as they were before"

I especially enjoyed the subtle humor woven in a post so serious. You truly have a gift for writing.

"We weren’t thinking about the fact that this wasn’t some well-vetted adventure ride at Disney World."

We have been praying for you and your family and will continue to do so. Thank you for highlighting courage...we all can use more.

God bless, stay strong, fight hard!

Bobby D

jodymcnatt said...

Bobby - Thank you for commenting. I know my blog doesn't make commenting very easy, so I appreciate the extra effort. And I appreciate, even more, your encouragement and your prayers. I know you and your sweet Lane have walked the cancer road. It is a weary one, indeed. And like much of life, it is entirely hopeless if we choose to walk it without Jesus. He is the only thing, the only ONE who can make sense of this nonsense. And for that I remain grateful.
Again, thanks for the comment and for thinking I was able to weave a little humor in there successfully. Laughter is good medicine ... xoxo