Walking Each Other Home

Recently I had to go back to a group of my dearest friends and ask their forgiveness. We had been out to dinner and, I guess, unfortunately, my filter had been out to lunch. You know the filter—The one which measures the words and curbs the tongue; that filter which keeps us from doing, thinking or (a-hem) saying things we shouldn't. Yep, that one. 

For believers, that's the Holy Spirit. And though the Holy Spirit isn’t really ever out to lunch, sometimes that thing in us which hears him and obeys certainly is. Sadly, I wasn't listening to his prompting that night at dinner. My tongue wagged without restraint and I used it to discredit another person not sitting around the table. I shared too much. Bottom line: I gossiped. And I was wrong. Doesn’t even matter if what I said was true, saying it was wrong. I was wrong. 

I’ll admit this tongue and all these wild words inside of me, well, they get me in trouble sometimes. Bella’s been listening to the musical, Hamilton, on repeat this summer—she’s trying to memorize all the lyrics/raps (bless her). There’s this line in one of the songs between Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton which I keep running into: “talk less, smile more.” Gosh, what a zinger! Every time it comes on, I am convicted. Yes, Jody, yes! “talk less, smile more.” 

Why is this so hard for me? Ugh. 

But hard it is. For a lot of us. So hard that James devotes an entire chapter to “taming the tongue.” Actually all five chapters of James touch on the topic. Interestingly enough, Bella is also spending this summer reading the book of James as part of her summer assignment for school. So there you go: I just can’t escape this topic, can I? Similarly to Hamilton, James instructs us right away in the very first chapter to “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” Later in the book James writes, “no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” (James 3:8). "Deadly poison" - yikes! 

But here’s the deal. Though I could go on and on about the tongue and it’s temptations (because, as we have already established, I am quite familiar with this particular struggle) the point of my writing today isn’t really about my repentance, it’s more about the response of my friends. Every one of them was quick to offer forgiveness. No one hesitated. It was beautiful and a true example of genuine grace. They all had kind, encouraging words, but my wise friend, Cathy, said something which pressed most deeply into me. “Ooh Jody, I love your heart. 'We are all just walking each other home.'” 

“Walking each other home.” Now I know that phrase is attributed to Ram Dass and he and I probably don’t agree on a whole lot spiritually, but I think we do agree on the fact of an “after life” and that we are moving toward it together in community. And regardless of our differences of theological belief, I really do love those words. 

Mostly, I love how Cathy used them in the context of Christian friendship. I love her heart behind them. I love the grace, understanding and empathy in them —None of us are doing it perfectly. None of us have got it all figured out. None of us always come up smelling like roses. None of us can go out to dinner with friends and not make a choice which might later call for some confession. What Cathy was saying was—“girl, we are in this together!” We are helping each other along. We are holding each other’s hands. We are steadfast when a sister stumbles. We are faithful when a friend falters. We are dependable when a daughter of the King takes an ugly nose dive. We are here. We are present. We are along for the ride. We are all doing the best we can walking home together — home to heaven. 

It’s not easy. We need each other. We need accountability. We need opportunity to ask forgiveness. We need community, and, what's more, we have a responsibility to extend grace. 

If we call ourselves true followers of Jesus, then THIS is how we must treat each other. When God’s word instructs us to “confess our sins to one another,” (James 5:16) it also instructs us how to respond — 

1. “Be merciful…” Luke 6:36 

2. “Bear one another’s burdens.” Galatians 6:2 

3. “Encourage one another and build one another up.” 1Thessalonians 5:11 

4. “Stir up one another to love and good works.” Hebrews 10:24 

5. “Have … sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart…” 1 Peter 3:8 

6. “Live in harmony with one another.” Romans 12:16 

7. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another.” Ephesians 4:32 

8. “Show hospitality to one another.” 1 Peter 4:9 

9. “Beloved, let us love one another.” 1 John 4:7 

10. “Keep loving one another earnestly.”1 Peter 4:8 

Nope, not always easy. I agree. But these words aren’t given as a list of God’s top 10 popular suggestions. They are required behavior for us as believers. Truth is, they make our life here on earth better when we work in tandem as empathetic sisters and brothers. God makes it clear in His word: We are in this together. And it can be beautiful -- like the grace my girlfriends showed me. We need to confess to one another, but we also need to come alongside one another.

Because, dear ones, we all [hopefully] are “just walking each other home.”

"My home is in heaven. I'm just traveling through this world." ~ Billy Graham