finally, a screen flashed number 24. it was my turn to head back into the cubicle with the shuffling, mumbling woman in charge. she didn't smile. she barely responded to my "good morning." she never once looked into my eyes. but i followed her obediently to the correct desk. after confirming my information on the monitor, she, in perfect monotone, directed me to the scanning machine. within seconds my fingerprints flashed in front of me. my fingerprints. mine. no one else in this entire dull place could claim these prints. no one in the city of atlanta. no one in the world. they are mine. the irony struck me: here we were in this most non-personal, most anti-individual experience, capturing the very thing that defines us and separates us from each other. someone else owns my same jeans, my same jacket...someone else has a dirty blond ponytail and wears silver hoop earrings just like mine. someone else brushed their teeth this morning with colgate and washed their hair with pantene. there are lots of jody's out there...and probably even another jody mcnatt or two. but no one, not one other human, has my fingerprint. i can stand here in this greyest of grey rooms and know that i was created uniquely.
"i praise you because i am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, i know that full well.
my frame was not hidden from you when i was made in the secret place.
when i was woven together in the depth of the earth,
your eyes saw my unformed body." ~ psalm 139: 14-16.
"for you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." ~psalm 139:13
if our God can give us the unique stamp of our fingerprint, the unique compostion of our DNA, the unique chemistry of our personality, can we deny that He, indeed, has a specific plan and design for our lives. can we atempt to question or ignore that He has a unique purpose already etched into our future? this tiny toddler is as far from me as the east is from the west, and yet she is known completely by the same God that completely knows me.
bella's adoption has been a continual reminder of the planner, designer, creator, knitter God. recently i heard the statistic that out of all adoptions which begin, only 2% ever reach completion. is this not staggering? after journeying this far, we understand that number. obstacles and anxieties seem to travel this same road. i can see why defeat and surrender are commonplace. there are items on the list which prove daunting and the list is long. and yet, we belong to a God who knows not only the length of our list, but who knows the very curves of our fingerprint. He has it perfectly imprinted in His memory. and what's best, He doesn't require a scanner or a photo or sterile colored room to identify us.